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Sunday 25 October 2020

Village Life!

 

    “What’s the meaning of this General Purposes committee meeting?”
    “You haven’t heard?”
    “No, I’ve been away on special assignment.”
    “No.2 has decided to put a ban on smoking in the village!”
    “Really! What put that idea in her head?”

  
“It came about when Number 48 decided to try and escape.”

   
“What’s that got to do with putting a ban on smoking?”

   
“Well Number 48 decided to strike out for the far side of the estuary. The supervisor issued an Orange Alert and despatched the Guardian to subdue him.”

   
“I fail to see.”

   
“Number 48 was smoking at the time, and he had a long stick
    “I still don’t see.”
   
“When Number 48 saw the Guardian approaching, he attached the lighted cigarette to the end of the stick. Then he waved the stick at the Guardian.”

   
“In trying to fend it off you mean.”

   
“Worse than that. Number 48 attempted to burst the Guardian as though it were a balloon by stabbing it with the tip of his lighted cigarette!”

   
“He didn’t?!”

   
“He did, so as I tell you did it happen.”

   
“It didn’t work I take it?”

   
“Of course not, it was a prosperous idea; mind you a medic had to rub soothing camomile lotion to the burn marks on the Guardian’s membrane!”

   
“And Number 48?”

   
“He’s made us all suffer now, with this non-smoking policy Number 2 is trying to put through.”

   
“We could block it.”

   
“How?”

   
“It states in the village charter that it’s the right if every free citizen to be able to light a cheroot on occasion.”

 
  “Does it, I didn’t know that.”

   
“Well have you read the charter?”

   
“No.”

   
“No, and I bet Number 2 hasn’t either!”

   
“Coffee before we go in?”

   
“Why not, cigarette?”

   
“Cheers.”

   
“It might be our last!”

   
“I was going to give them up anyway!”

Be seeing you

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