THE TALLY HO

Appreciation Day!

                   by our own reporter 

    Yesterday being Thursday was Appreciation Day, the day when we the good citizens of this community gave due honor to those brave and noble men who govern us so wisely! It was a happy occasion, and the day went off rather well, and probably better than planned. The ceremony was opened by a speech by No.2 himself, followed by the unveiling of the Appreciation Day monument. No.2 of course has been quietly working behind the scenes on projects for the good of the village and its community. The improved Café facilities, the extra blue zone in your post, the new flower borders. The extra recreation hour, the new golf course, and the new clock golf. And then there are the new plans he has laid down, the new concert hall which is to be built, along with the beautiful mural in the library, as well as the electrification of the clocks. And so No.2 was saluted for his glorious achievements, and that was marked by the unveiling of a monument marked “ACHIEVEMENT.” I thought No.2’s speech was somewhat drawn out, he did look rather nervous, But I put that down to the emotion of the day, after all his term in office was coming quickly to an end and he would then be leaving us after putting so much into the village on our behalf. As for the speech by the new No.2, it was somewhat hurried. At the time I just thought that he was in a hurry to get the Appreciation Day ceremony over and done with, keen as he was to get on with the job. It wasn’t until later, when I saw them taking away No.51 along with his daughter, that I began asking questions. It would appear that a terrorist cell has been operating in the village, so called dissidents, and that a plan to assassinate No.2 had been organized. It was a two-man cell apparently, the little Watchmaker being one of them. He made the trigger device of a bomb concealed in a replica of the Great Seal of office. In confessing his part in this dastardly act, the Watchmaker has completely gone off his rocker, and his shop is now closed, and a forensic search is now being carried out there. What the forensic team are looking for is unknown, but a source did reveal that it is traces of explosives. Why anyone would wish to murder this old No.2 is anyone’s guess, but it may well be that to do so would have been to strike a blow against the suppression of this community, and the administration which governs us. It would appear that the fears of the previous No.2, and his half crazed imaginings of enemies within our midst, and the conspiracy against No.2 were well founded, and have now been proved! Jammers appear to have been behind this latest bomb threat, you will recall the bomb threat against No.2 when disguised in a Cuckoo clock it was left at the door of the Green Dome. That of course turned out to be nothing more than a bomb scare. And then there was the occasion when No2 told the doctor that she would warn him when No.6 puts a bomb in his lovely hospital! So was No.6 the second man in this terrorist cell? Apparently not! In this case No.6 turned out to be the hero of the day. My source revealed that No.6 had apparently got wind of an assassination attempt against No.2, and went to warn No.2 who was then officially assigned to the case, and told to get close to No.50 the watchmaker’s daughter, as the Watchmaker himself had become suspect. This was done using a clever ploy that his wristwatch had stopped, and went to the Watchmaker to get it repaired, whilst there he made a search of the shop, and came across the trigger device for the bomb. Later a replica of the Great Seal of Office was discovered, but left in situ so that the threat could be left to play out in order that the terrorists convict themselves. It was through No.6’s persistence and intervention that the bomb threat was averted, and No.2’s life saved. One unexplained occurrence was the death of No.100. There were signs that a violent struggle had taken place, it is unknown whether No.100 encountered the second member of the terrorist cell, however it has been made clear that he was suffocated to death. But why?

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