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Sunday 3 January 2021

The Tally Ho

 Watchmaker In Conspiracy to Murder!

by our own reporter

   It has been reported that No.51, the watchmaker, was at the centre of an assassination plot against the now retired No.2. Facts have come to light that the watchmaker, not only made a replica of the Great Seal of office which he packed with plastic explosive {how and from where he obtained the plastic explosive has yet to be determined} and made an electronic remote control which he planned to detonate during the Appreciation Day ceremony.
    Apparently No.6 was made aware of this dastardly assassination plot against one of our great leaders, having been alerted to it by the Watchmaker’s daughter, No.50. Then having become involved himself, he set about thwarting the assassination with the aid of his sidekick No.50.
    No.6 went to warn the interim No.2 of the assassination plot against him, however it would appear that he had warned the wrong No.2, the real target was No.2 who had only recently returned to the village after a spell of leave. Having realized his mistake No.6 paid a second call at the Green Dome to persist with his warning of an assassination plot. However it seemed No.2 did not believe him, why should they want to kill No.2, he had returned to the village just in time for his retirement, if you can believe that!
    How the watchmaker was able to replace the Great Seal of office with the replica has yet to be determined, I understand that an interview has been carried out with The Keeper of the Great Seal, the diminutive butler as he has fallen suspect of having been ‘in’ on the plot to murder No.2. However the butler is yet to say a single word on the subject! So having made the switch the plan was to detonate the bomb by electronic remote control at the moment the Great Seal had been hung about No.2’s neck and shoulders. However the bomb was not detonated. This came about by the intervention of No.6, who not only saved the life of No.2, but also the community of any possible mass reprisals which may have been carried out by No.2’s successor, the new No.2, upon the innocent citizens.
    No.51 insists that it was No.100 who put him up to taking part in the attempted assassination of No.2, this could lead to the fact that No.100 who was found dead, apparently suffocated to death by the Guardian on a grassy knoll not 5 paces from No.6’s cottage. A contact in the control room allowed me to scrutinize a surveillance tape. It showed that there was a vicious fight between No.6 and No.100 as he impeded No.6. The Guardian appeared on the scene emitting a noise something like a cross between a bicycle pump, someone breathing through an aqua lung, and Gregorian chant! Why it should attack No.100 and not No.6 remains to be resolved, seeing as No.100’s position was within administration. Perhaps the Guardian saw No.100 as the protagonist and took the decision to protect No.6. On the other hand perhaps the Guardian was used to silence No.100, so that he could not reveal the plan along with the identity of the person behind Plan Division Q to the wider community. Because investigation has proved that it was No.2’s own people who were behind the smokescreen of the assassination plot, which was actually a planned execution of No.2. But the plan failed, and was swept under the carpet. Certainly it was not for the citizens to find out just how close they came to a purge of malcontents within the community. No.6 being top of that list, one might think he was conducting an act of self preservation when he undertook to involve himself with assassination plot called Plan Division Q. As for the old No.2 he now enjoys quiet retirement in the Old People’s Home. As for the new No.2, he now realizes to his cost, that for any plan to succeed its best not to involve No.6!

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