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Sunday, 12 August 2018

Who Is That On The Telephono?

    “Yes who is this?
    “Is it convenient to pop round for a few words?”
    “Not really. How did you get to call me on this telephone?”
    “Bit ungainly isn’t, almost as though someone was having a laugh at your expense!”
    “Look who are you?”
    “I’m Number One-one-three, I contribute to The Tally Ho.”
    “The Tally Ho, never heard of it!”
    “My readers are always interested in a new Number Two, just a few words if you have the time. You know the sort of thing, just some background information. Race, religion, hobbies, what you like to read, what you like to eat. What you were, what you want to be, any family illnesses, any politics?”
    “I’m sorry, I don’t have the time.”
    “Well perhaps we could arrange a meeting for some time when you’re less busy, next week shall we say?”
    “I won’t be here next week.......I only have three days!”
    “Three days? That must be the shortest term in office of any Number 2 in Village history!”
    “Well if you’ll excuse me........”
    “We haven’t seen very much of you Number Two, perhaps you can give our readers a taste of the kind of work you have been doing.”
    “No that’s not possible, now if you don’t mind, buzz off you irritating man............oh sorry sir, no I didn’t mean you, I was speaking to the reporter for The Tally Ho...............no I didn’t tell him anything.....................no, I don’t know how he managed to get this number........yes I realize that sir, but if I had a week......................yes sir, I realize my future is at stake................bastard................no sir, I didn’t mean to say that, are you there, oh he’s rung off!”


Be seeing you

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