School Days

Those are the days, the days that are gone. The faces forgotten, the memories linger on..... Southminster.

Old boy: "So, you're the new boy here."

New Boy: "Yes sir."

"Well there's nothing to be afraid of here. You'll soon get to know our little ways."

"What little ways are those?"

"Well for a start you'll be my "fag."

"You mean I have to do everything you say."

"As well cleaning my shoes, football kit, rugger boots, to make no mention of my cricket box!"

"Will I have a "fag?"

"Smoking is usually done round the back of the bicycle shed."

"You trying to be funny?"

"Look, settle down quickly is my advice. You don't want to end up being sent on the school jump."

"School jump, what's that all about?"

"Well at my last school there was the school hop over the Yorkshire moors. Hopping for mile upon mile, and on one leg. But here, the school jump, you jump when the school bully tells you to. School boys falling foul of the school jump, have been known to jump on the spot for hours, sometimes for days, at a time."

"It sounds like corporal punishment."

"Yes, and there are times when you're called before the headmaster."

"What happens then?"

"If you are lucky, you get to flog him!"

"If you're an "old boy" here, can I ask how long you've been at this school?"

"Forty-three years next michlemass. Come, lets sing the old school song as we go."

"Go where?"

"To watch the netball team."

"You mean there are girls here at this school?"

"Not exactly. The net ball team are made up from 3b, they like to dress up in gym-slips, stockings and such like."

"Fascinating!"

"Indeed. You know what they say."

"No what do they say?"

"You can't beat a public school education!"

Those are the days, the days that are gone. The faces forgotten, the memories linger on......Southminster.

BCNU