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Thursday 12 June 2014

Who's That On The Telephono?


   No.2 "Yes, who is it, what do you want?"
   No.112 "It's the shopkeeper sir, I'm on black."
   "Its the shopkeeper sir."
   "Yes I know it is. What else did you say?"
   "I'm on black."
   "Are you at the roulette table?"
   "I beg your pardon sir?"
   "I asked you if you were at the roulette table in the Palace of Fun."
   "I didn't know I should be sir."
   "Then what's all this about you being on black?"
   "The telephono sir, I'm on black, what colour are you on?"
   "Well if its anything to do with you, I'm on yellow. Now look what is it you want?"
   "Its Number Six sir."
   "Oh no, he's not been listening to records again has he? We wasted enough time on that yesterday!"
   "No sir, its not anything like that."
   "What is it then?"
   "He's bought a Cuckoo clock!"
   "A what?"
   "A Cuckoo clock sir."
   "What would Number Six want with a Cuckoo clock? Look why are you telling me this?"
   "You wanted any unusual activity reported which involved Number Six. He bought a Cuckoo clock and I'm reporting it."
   "And that's unusual?"
   "Well he's never bought one before! But it's not so much the Cuckoo clock................."
   "Isn't it?"
   "No sir. You see he didn't want the one I picked."
   "Didn't he?"
   "No sir, he seemed more interested in a particular box!"
   "A box!"
   "Yes sir, the Cuckoo clocks arrived in boxes."
   "You're telling me that Number 6 bought a Cuckoo clock, but was more interested in a particular box."
   "That's right sir."
   "Stop talking rot, and get off the line!"
   "I'm not in the habit of talking rot sir!"
   "Well you're giving a damned good impression. Now get off the line!"
   "But sir, he bought a small notebook."
   "I expect Number Six didn't want the notebook you picked for him either!"
   "No sir, I gave him a nice little selection from which he picked one himself."
   "Oh get off the line...pigmy!"
   "There's no need to be like that sir, I'm only doing my job!"
   "And I'll do you for wasting my time!"
   "Oh he's rung off. I expect he's got one of his moods on!"


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